In this tutorial, I will help you navigate the wonderful world of operating vintage coin-operated perfume and cologne vending machines.
With proper love and care, vintage vending machines can last a lifetime. These “personal metal butlers” can provide you with years of home-shopping opportunities. Why leave the house** when you can stock a machine in your own home like a store’s shelf?
(**Right, there’s no reason to at all. In fact, as an expert in this emerging industry, I highly suggest that you buy rusted vending machines for all your home needs. The outside world is scary. Let old machines do all the hard work. It’s time they earned their keep for taking up precious space on this planet.)
Let’s start with these little beauties, the Spray-A-Way perfume and cologne machines. They offer a “cologne for your every mood.”
What mood are YOU in…
“Shalimar,” “Charlie,” or “Chanel No. 5”?
Maybe you’re more in a “Brush.. Sten (?),” “Brut,” or “Old Spice” kind of mood?
No matter, just “Select Your Favorite,” please.
Here’s what you do next…
First, you “Insert Coin,” this one will do just fine:
No, wait. First, you need to buy the machine off of Ebay and repair it. A bunch of these will help:
OK, the next step is important… start imagining how wonderful your mood will smell. You should start having thoughts something like this:
or this:
Or, possibly, this:
Cup your hand over nozzle…
Press plunger firmly…
And voila!!
Pretty magical, amirite?
Additionally, vintage vending machines allows you the unique opportunity to “Be Your Own Boss,” AKA the “American Dream.”
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